The Eagle Toastmasters Club
Public Speaking & Leadership Club
The Ipad Generation
- By TM Akinolu Oyegun
One cool Friday afternoon last October, Sharon Seline exchanged text messages with her daughter who was in college. They ‘chatted’ back and forth; mom asking how things were going and daughter answering with positive statements followed by symbols showing smiles, big smiles and hearts.
Sharon and her daughter had a successful electronic interaction.
…..Later that night, her daughter attempted suicide.
In the days that followed, it came to light that she’d been holed up in her room, crying and showing signs of depression; a completely different reality from the one that she conveyed in texts, Facebook posts and tweets.
As human beings, our only real method of connection is through authentic communication. Studies show that only 7% of communication is based on the written or verbal word. A whopping 93% is based on nonverbal body language. Indeed, it’s only when we can hear a tone of voice or look into someone’s eyes that we’re able to know when “I’m fine” doesn’t mean they are fine at all. This brings me to what the renowned Management Guru, Peter Druker said: “The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn’t said.” Awash in technology, anyone can hide behind the text, the e-mail, the Facebook post or the tweet, projecting any image they want and creating an illusion of their choosing. They can be whoever they want to be.
Indeed, technologies used for communication have changed the dynamics of human interaction. This presents an unprecedented paradox. With all the powerful social technologies, ipads and mobile phones at our fingertips, we are more connected, and potentially more disconnected than ever before. The reality is that we are interacting at breakneck speed and frequency through social media. Social technologies have broken the barriers of space and time, enabling us to interact 24/7 with more people than ever before. But are we really communicating? We have lost the human touch; we have almost forgotten that a genuine smile and an enthusiastic hand clap from a supporting friend or a pat at the back cannot be replaced by computer simulations of applause.
Suddenly, it appears one’s life must revolve around ipads, iphones and all these communication devices and that we have always been used to them. Certainly, not in Nigeria. GSM was launched in Nigeria in 2001, just about 12 years ago.
Suddenly, it appears that we must pick every phone call, and when we lose our phones and ipads, it is as if our hearts have stopped beating. When we sleep, our phones are by the pillow and are a ready companion even in the bathroom. I really wander how we coped when there was no mobile communication in Nigeria.
I recalled that throughout my stay at the university, there was no such thing as mobile communication. I was staying on campus then and there was a day I had a party date with a young lady whose hall of residence was almost 2 kilometers from mine within the same campus and on my way to pick her for the party, I had an hour of unavoidable delay. By the time I got to her hostel, sweating profusely, and full of expectations, there was no trace of the girl. Eventually when I saw her several days later, she admitted that after waiting patiently without any sign of me, she thought I wasn’t coming for the party any more. Who knows? Probably a single text message could have saved my party date!
Social technologies has introduced a New Set of Communication Barriers
Is the focus now on communication quantity versus quality? It is common to see someone multitasking while communicating with someone else. You could be talking on the phone while surfing the internet; you could be checking your e-mail and using your mobile phone simultaneously. Communications technologies have made all this possible. However, although you think that you are saving time by engaging in this sort of multitasking, the net effect is that the quality of the communication suffers if you can’t give your undivided attention to the person you are communicating with
Social media has the potential to make us less social; a surrogate for the real thing. This breeds social isolation and reduction in face- to face interaction. I think there is the potential for greater richness in face-to-face interaction because you lose the body cues and facial expressions when you’re communicating only on the internet.
For social media to be a truly effective communication vehicle, all parties bear a responsibility to be genuine, accurate, and not allow it to replace human contact altogether. At the workplace, the use of electronic communication has overtaken face-to-face and voice-to-voice communication by a wide margin. This major shift has been driven by two major forces: the speed/geographic dispersion of business, and the lack of comfort with traditional interpersonal communication among a growing segment of our employee population. All these have led to reduction in the quality of our communication.
